Your 5-year-old asks for the tablet as soon as they walk in the door. They already get 30 minutes a day and want more.

Why this situation matters

The possible answers

Tap the option you would choose

• A

  “Today you’ll have your 30 minutes after snack time. If you like, we can play something else before then.”

  Ideal answer. Why this is the ideal answer: Maintaining the limit (30 min) + giving agency over when and with what complementary activity teaches self-regulation. The screen is neither an enemy nor a reward: it's just another activity that has its place.
• B

  “No way. Screens are poison.” I confiscate the tablet for a week.

  Not the ideal one. Why this falls short: Demonizing screens and punishing creates obsession and secret use as soon as they can. External control doesn't teach internal control.
• C

  I give them the tablet, so I can get a break.

  Not the ideal one. Why this falls short: Giving in due to adult exhaustion turns the screen into a digital pacifier. This is associated with poorer sleep and attention.
• D

  I’m on my phone, so fine, I’ll let them have theirs too.

  Not the ideal one. Why this falls short: Modeling: what you do speaks louder than what you say. If you're glued to your phone, your discourse on screens won't convince anyone.

What the experts say

• American Academy of Pediatrics

  2016 screen time guidelines

• Catherine L'Ecuyer

  author of 'Educating in Wonder'

Devil's advocate

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